Do you ever look closely at yourself in the mirror or scrutinize a photo and find yourself being hyper critical of every inch of your face and body? Has your inner dialogue ever sounded something like this — “I hate the way my eyes wrinkle and crease. Look at all the cellulite and rolls! Why is everything starting to sag?” Perhaps you have some of your own to add?
I hate that so many of us struggle with body image, but it’s comforting to know we’re not alone. I’ve recently listened to multiple podcast discussions about how growing up in the 80s and 90s the blaring message from basically everywhere was that female athletes should be skinny. We believed skinny meant faster. We were bombarded with marketing and messages of endless ways to lose weight regardless of how thin we actually were. In our minds, there was always room and ways to get skinnier.
Decades later we’re realizing what that messaging has cost our bodies and minds. We missed a valuable opportunity to build essential muscles and a healthy relationship with our bodies and food. Thankfully, many women are sharing their stories while scientists are conducting more research focused on women to better understand how we can take care of our bodies in each stage of life in order to thrive. Thanks to women like Stacy Sims, Selene Yeager, Lauren Fleshman, and Kara Goucher (who have all recently released amazing books) we are learning how to fuel healthy bodies, how strength training and eating more is essential to athletic performance and long-term health, and that talking about all of it is vital.
That’s the opposite message so many of us grew up with thanks to an explosion of diet culture and general lack of knowledge about the changes a female athlete’s body goes through and the considerations that should be taken. Fortunately there are countless inspirational stories about women who grew up this way (especially professional athletes), but are determined to prove that healthy equals strong and we should embrace that . We may have missed an opportunity, but it’s not too late to do something about it! If we consider what our bodies are capable of, maybe we will be more motivated to treat ourselves better as we move forward.
Just recently I found myself reminiscing about when my kids were little. I didn’t like my body because of extra pregnancy weight and instead of being in awe of what my body was doing, I was constantly fighting it. Those days were defined by endless sleepless nights dawning into full workdays. At work I’d lock myself in my classroom during lunch to pump, never taking a break. Then I’d pick the kids up from daycare, drive home and start the next shift consisting of family time, house responsibilities and grading papers, all the while “dealing” with fluctuating hormones (by cursing them), the aftermath of childbirth and the constant desire to lose weight. I’m amazed at what I powered through back then.
I mean seriously, how do our bodies do it?
We work full-time while growing a human inside of us (just think about that – our bodies GROW another human and we carry-on!) then we pop it out and immediately begin to nourish it every few hours without sleep, all while our body tries to mend. Then we hurry back to work and try to cope with being separated from this beautiful being we just housed and grew for nine months.
None of this helps our raging hormones, levels of stress or intense emotions that accompany motherhood. But somehow we keep going! Our body bounces back and carries us through! It’s an incredible experience that I am so grateful for having twice. But how many of us allowed ourselves a moment to breathe and recognize how amazing our bodies are through it all? I never did. I just always wished it could be better, fitter, skinnier, and more capable. I wish I had taken a moment back then to allow my mind to be blown by what my body was going through at every stage.
This is only one (but major) example of how women are naturally strong! The ability to bear children is an incredible gift, yet we don’t always connect all the changes we go through, starting in puberty to prepare for this miracle. Especially as athletes, because these changes temporarily slow us down, and immediately we believe we’re failures and end up doing whatever we can to fight the natural process. We need to embrace our strength, build upon it and celebrate it! No one should ever feel the need to starve themselves or hate themselves because their body looks a certain way. It’s time to appreciate our body as a gift, to learn about how to best take care of it during each stage of life, and not be ashamed to love it enough to strengthen it so it can carry us through decades of adventures.
Make the decision with me to THRIVE and not just survive as we get older. Look back on all those previous years of not loving, or appreciating, our miraculous bodies and declare, “Damn, I was, and still am, pretty amazing!”
Our attitudes can empower the younger generations to talk positively about themselves. We can teach them how to navigate the changes their bodies will go through by understanding WHY it happens and HOW they can nurture themselves. We can teach young kids how to be healthy, proud and strong. Social media has created a world where young girls (and all of us!) are bombarded with filtered images, unrealistic body goals and constant feedback (positive and negative) about how they look. Let’s embrace being REAL and let’s be honest about what we go through. We don’t need to idolize our bodies or obsess over them, but we should appreciate our body’s natural abilities and beauty without the pressure to “fix” ourselves.
Let’s look in the mirror, and instead of obsessing over every perceived flaw, make a commitment to give ourselves what we need to be strong, vibrant, active, and healthy.
My body has gone through a lot mentally and physically through the years and it looks like perimenopause will present more challenges. But everything I’ve gone through has gifted me with resilience, strength, the ability to adapt, the power to heal, and to make better choices that will help me thrive.
Do me a favor. When you look in the mirror today, take a moment to see your body for the miracle it truly is and make a commitment to be kind to it. Your future self (and future generations) will thank you for it.
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What is something amazing your body has carried you through?
Think about all your body is capable of — thinking, moving, building muscle, healing, digesting, feeling, etc. Do you do everything you can to nourish it and take care of it? What’s one thing you can do today to begin?